Sunday, December 30, 2007

Sniffling, sneezing, scratching, stuffy head, fever, so you can rest...

That evil, dreaded cold bug that's been flying all over these south central plains, spreading its North Vile Virus has claimed yet another victim...your humble servant. I'm a wuss when ill. Of course, the Sandman has been pretty wary around me the past few nights, apparently he doesn't want any part of this bug, so that doesn't help. Grammy tells me i need that Alka Seltzer Cold and Flu...but i despise that execrable effervescent throat lava. But...if it helps. Alas, we don't have any and i don't feel like tooling my happy little...alas down to Devil Mart for the procurement. So i settled for the 2 month expired Theraflu and just choked it down...please hold while i stifle the heaves...

I was able to drag myself out to the field today for the absolute last chance at a deer by high velocity lead dipped death. Nothing, not one blessed twitch of an ear, scrape of a hoof, no blow, snort, fart...NOTHING! Well, except for me unsuccessfully trying to squelch my own barking from that infernal tickle in my throat! Hence, no venison. Fortunately, i have brothers in arms that are going to very generously hook us up, so yes, the dehumidifier will be in high gear before long. So if you're in the area, and needin' some jerky, just swing on in, The Table will be full.

I have fully realized now that past performance does not necessarily guarantee present or future production, especially in cases of minimal investment.


Skunked for another year, well at least for the deer. Hogs beware, the hunter is pissed and there are no bag limits for your sorry crusty pelts...and i intend to make FULL use of that little technicality.


Speaking of, since we didn't see any deer yesterday either, we took out our frustrations on some local vagrant farmland vandals. This one turned out pretty nice. With my huntin' buddies Blue and Bubba, we found a nice little covey of about 30 these philistines and enjoyed some moving target practice. This obviously being the trophy of the point and click session. To wit, we all took at least multiple shots at him, so we immediately claimed him as "community hog". Although, ballistics tests indicate that Blue's love letter didn't like its stay in the heart and passed on through. Bubba's 300 ShortMag apparently found a home in...well let's just leave it at eunuchized. Yeah, ouch! Nothing like losing the goonies and then dying...no wonder he started kickin'. But from our perspective, not bad for about 225 yards moving at 15-20 mph. He weighed in at a respectable 245. He's going on the wall at the CCC Ranch. I feel honored to have a part in at least two of the mounts there now.

So, the weekend was salvaged at least by that...oh and...the REAL Bowl season begins in less than 24 hours!!!!

And therefore, dear reader, i bid you a fond... oooOOOOOOOOO PIG SOOOEY!!!!!

7 comments:

Doc said...

Jay, If you enjoy non-fiction, check out Michael Pollan's The Omnivore's Dilemma. I read it back in the winter and got to hear him and meet him when he spoke at Colorado College. I love to hunt, though I seldom get to do it these days. An excerpt from Pollan's book inspired some pretty serious thoughts in a post back in February about the gall it takes to condemn hunters but still buy meat at the supermarket. I won't launch off here. I point out the book though because a hunt for wild boar figures prominently in one section of it. And, with a blog titled as yours is, it seems like a book you would enjoy. Blue skies, Doc

The Friendly Neighborhood Piper said...

Doc, after reading a few short minutes of excerpts from the link, i was hooked. I see this book lounging in the friedly confines in my not-to-distant-future. I will assuredly be checking out that February entry. But first, the news. When i read this,

"It turns out that the price of a calorie of sugar or fat has plummeted since the 1970's. One reason that obesity and diabetes become more prevalent the further down the socioeconomic scale you look is that the industrial food chain has made energy-dense foods the cheapest foods in the market, when measured in terms of cost per calorie."

THAT made my mandible hit the proverbial floor. I see that so much every where i go! We, meaning the Queen and i, fill our cart with as fairly healthy food as we possibly can. Then the checkout stand becomes a little more for me as i checkout the stuff everyone else is buying...its for the most part, sickening. Beautifully packaged, pictured with enticing food porn, frozen and just waiting to slide down the gullet on its way to its ultimate goal of clogging any and every artery its basic elements come in contact with. AND THEIR BASKET IS FULL OF IT! And i pause to think..."are you really saving that much money with the thousands you're going to be spending later on medical bills?" Sure we pay a little more now because we try to buy better quality products now, but is it not unlike throwing small amounts into an investment portfolio on a weekly basis, for future returns? I have so many random thoughts running unrestrained on this subject i'll have to go read your post now, maybe it will help organize the troops. Thanks for the recommendation, it looks fantastic.

Buck Pennington said...

Wow, after that exchange my "Dang! That's a BIG hog!" comment pales by comparison!

I, too, shake my head at the contents of most folks' shopping carts, the most egregious of which seem to be driven by VERY Large Ladies. We sure can be dumb for being such a smart society as a whole...

TFNP said...

Uncle Buck,

That's really all that needs to be said. Good thing we had it strapped to that deer cart. Pushing it up the creek bank was NO FUN and ended up busting a wheel on the cart on the way up. Also good there were three of us.

Bag Blog said...

You know I never really thought about it before, but when you mentioned going hunting with your buddies, "Blue and Bubba" I got tickled thinking, how redneck can you get? Actually, Blue and Bubba were showing off the pics of the hog at the New Year's party, but they forgot to mention to me that you were in on the shoot. Some buddies!

Try Drixoral for the head-cold at night. And lay off the fat lady stories.

The Friendly Neighborhood Piper said...

OK, first you accuse me of being a west coast yankee, now doing me the honor of dubbing me a redneck...i'm confused.

Actually, the former claims being founded since the mayo in the guac does come from a modified west coast recipe. The latter claim...well, what is there to say, i went wild hog hunting with two guys named Blue and Bubba... Guilty as charged. As for them not mentioning me...i can see their angle...i was there shooting my gun...not necessarily hitting anything, just spraying some lead with friends. Of course, i do pause in thinking that i have been present for both of Blue's trophy kills, he calls me his "good luck charm" perhaps that SHOULD warrant SOME comment.

Grammy said...

Whether or not you like the taste of "throat lava" or not, IT WORKS. Son #1 arrived New Years Eve w/ Kelly & Kale to spend the night. #1 woke up this morning having a hard time breathing so Grampy mixed him up the "execrable effervescent throat lava." Later he said that he felt better.