Friday, July 24, 2009

Another Sweet Tea Rant...

but on a completely different scale. You can catch the first Sweet Tea Rant here...

You can blame this post on MamaLou, she and MamaBear, and Doc...

Last summer (yeah, its still THAT fresh in my mind) i was headed over to the bi-weekly volleyball meet at the sand court courtesy Halliburton. Now, couple things should be evident here...its a summer afternoon, sand courts are generally outside, no exceptions in this case, and obviously, i live in OK. So those three factors alone... ok i'm off...

I didn't take the time to make anything to drink, so i thought, "OK, i'll give this Sonic another stab..."

I pull in, and drive the entire loop to ensure they weren't too busy. It's late afternoon on Sunday, they weren't, maybe half a dozen patrons on the place, and some were already eating. I moor a slip just outside the service door so just to make it as easy as possible for the carhop to find me...

Push button...slight pause...electronic crackle...

Young, slightly post adolescent baritone "WHATD'YA NEED?...".

me: (blink) (blink...thinking "Really?") (clearing throat) "uhhhhhyeah...i'd like a Route 44 Raspberry Tea Sweet."

(pause)

"ZTHAT IT?"

me: (again, blink, thinking 'this isn't going to go well') "Yeah, that's it."

(pause, waiting for my total, ...pause extended)

"JEW WANT THAT SWEET?"

Seriously, i should've just eased away at that point...but no...i said, "Yeah, ROUTE. 44. RASPBERRY TEA. SWWEEEEET."

"AWRIGHT, HOLD ON." ...

...

...

"DOLLAR FORTY SEVEN."

me: (blink, jaw ever so slowly beginning to gape at this point, head slowly wagging downward).

Pause... short wait... extended wait... prolonged wait...carhop in, carhop out, carhop in...carhop out...in...out...in... you get it...

During this time i noticed a car pulled in next to me, the dude orders for he, and his family, they receive their order, burgers/fries and all, and make their escape...that gaping and wagging? Intensification a quantum level, or two. So there i am, waiting on a DRINK, and now late for my appointment, to which i had left in PLENTY of time...almost 15 minutes had passed...seriously.

So i get out of the car and walk into the service door...the scene was...chaotic to say the least...and all this with still maybe 6-8 cars in about a thirty to forty slip capacity.

So i stand there, again, waiting.

After a few MINUTES...a girl very frazzled and yet very direct says..."CAN I HELP YOU?!" so much for southern hospitality...her momma musta been a yankee.

me: (control and contain, control and contain) "yeah...i. just. need. my. drink."

"WELL WHAT IS IT?!"

me: (exhale, blink. do. not. lose. it. tighten. the. grip.) "ROUTE. 44. RASPBERRY. TEA. SWEET."

"ANYBODY KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT A ROUTE 44 TEA!!!?"

Over at the order board, a...dude...whose head looked considerably undersized for his oversized glangly body was trying to punch in orders like a monkey at a Cape Canaveral mission control panel looks up..."uhhhhhh, i thought it was a Dr. Pepper." So i look in the kitchen to the carhop expedite window...to find...nothing. There was nothing.

Now folks, i know you're thinking, "Why didn't you leave 15 minutes ago?" Well, had i not ALREADY PAID FOR IT by the only thing the DID work in that chumbucket, the credit card machine, i would've. Which is precisely what i was thinking while standing there...waiting...for anything...and a few more quietly anarchous minutes passed, like the carhops in and out of the door.

Finally, one of the girls, like any good quarterback, shoves a Route 44 drink into my midsection and walks away... ... ...

Had i had any good sense left i would've opened the drink right then and slowly poured it on the floor...happily. But the entire scenario had just completely rat nested my higher functions, like when you're throwing a baitcast reel and the lure doesn't travel fast enough for the spin of the reel and all that line backs up into your reel and you end up spending a half hour trying to detangle the mess...yeah...i just turned and walked out to my car...wondering why i couldn't see which part of the line to pull first. On the way, a lady had just pulled in beside me, her ragtop down. I slowly approach her, drink in hand...

me: "Ma'am?"

She looked at me somewhat perplexive...

me shaking my head: "Leave...just leave."

"Is it that bad?"

me: "They can't find their ass from a hole in the ground in there."

She laughs, shakes her head, jams in in reverse, and bails.

Glad to be of service...to someone. The reel starting to unravel already...

"I. will. never. come. here. again."

and i haven't, and i won't. The nearest Sonic is in another town 6 miles away, if i need a cheeseburger, i go there. This Sonic is just around the corner.

And folks...just so's you know...i ain't the only one...i mean, did you happen to catch the lady's reaction when i left...?

3 comments:

diamond dave said...

Sounds like most of the fast food establishments in the town I live in. The only places with any decent service here are McDonalds, Subway, Little Caesar's Pizza, and Firehouse Subs. So far. Just about everywhere else, I'll drive 15 miles down the road for. Oh yeah, there's a Sonic in town,too. Have to try it once.

Anonymous said...

Still over-the-top frustrating as H E double Q, even the 2nd time around the tale, but just darn hilarious. A sad commentary on our young people ! Honey

Buck said...

And some clue-impaired people wonder why their businesses go belly-up...